After these messages we'll be right back....

I know I was just getting on a roll, but I must take a brief hiatus as I pay a visit to the country known as England. Will be gone for five weeks.

Looking to start a podcast when I get back, you know turn it up a notch.

But if I can post from the road now and then I will.

Much Love

Trace

A closer look at WWF's mullet's

The mullet, one of history's greatest aesthetic pleasures, yet one of hair's biggest mistakes. It's such a unique blend of good and bad like Hypercolor shirts or Turbo Grafix 16.

I had a chance to watch Shawn Michaels new dvd. Great little watch, and one of the things that stuck out was HBK's killer mullet. Now it's not like it was a mullet he was wearing in the 80's although he did. He wore it clear into mid 90s. You have to respect that. I'm sure there is great debate as to when the mullet "officially" died off, but in the mid 90's it was alive and well in the then WWF. But who had the best one?

The Undertaker
The Undertaker is a certified bad ass no question. But when he hit the scene in 1991 and beat Hulk Hogan it scared me. It was his second greatest performance, only behind his role as 'Butch' with his one line in Suburban Commando "You're a dead man Ramsey". I think Taker's mullet didn't last as long as some others, but it certainly deserves a big nod.

Mr Perfect
I don't even know if you can call Mr Perfect's haircut a mullet. He always had his hair slicked back and in a pony tail. It amazingly stayed in tact for most of his matches. I don't know what was a bigger surprise, when at Summerslam in 1991 when Bret Hart kicked out of the "Perfect Plex" for the first time ever, or Mr Perfect's hair came completely unglued revealing the "perfect mullet". I was hoping after he would go to Metrodome and throw it a hundred yards down a football field and catch it himself but it never happened....

Shawn Michaels
The aforementioned HBK's mullet was a piece of art. He certainly gets props for his different styles, colours, and longevity. I think his mullet accomplishments are almost on a par with his in ring accomplishments. I always loved how he came out with Sherri and check out his mullet in a huge heart shaped mirror, or later his intercontinental title.

Bob "Spark Plugg" Holly
Bobby was kind of the like the "Deion Sanders" of the WWF. He wrestled and also was a "Nascar Driver". Of course he wasn't and it was all a fassaud. But there was nothing fake about his kick ass mullet. When he teamed with the 123 Kid and won the tag team titles it truly showed how powerful two mullets can be.

Razor Ramon
Oh man...looking back at this guy you just have to be in awe of him. Looking at him, hearing him, or whatever, he was gold. And he wore ten pounds of it to the ring every time. There might be some some debate as to did Ramon have an actual mullet, but rest assured he did. It usually came out mid way through the match. But what makes his mullet awesome, was the fact that it was completely greased out with the greatest sweater vest/chest to compliment it. He also had that little swervy strip at the front that looked like a snake. The source of all his "machismo".

The Nasty Boys
Brian Knobbs and Jerry Saggs rubbed guys in their armpits as a move. Simply put...innovative. Yet as great as that was, they also had this mullet where the top was spiked, the side was shaved, and the back straight. I don't even know how that's possible.

Pick em'-while there are many more you can bring into this debate, I have to say it's a draw between Ramon and HBK.

Wait...this is the guy who lives his life one quarter mile at a time?

There's things you see in life that just take your breath away.
You know like a beautiful sunset, the birth of your first child, and Vin Diesel breakdancing from the mid 80's.......
(This video may have been the best thing I have ever seen...I am totally loving the token white guy who pulls out the 'Yellow Pages' and 'Stalker'. They will be a nice compliment to my 'shopping cart' and 'lawnmower'.)

"Will Smith, this is your life..."

Hi, I'm Will Smith, I was born and made In America. Shortly thereafter, my charm and charisma earned me the princehood in the kingdom of Bel-Air. However, being a prince became a bore to me, so I decided to throw it all away and become a Bad Boy. The reason I became a Bad Boy is beacause I was searching for something with purpose and meaning, so one day I found independance. However, once I found my independance, I realized I needed support. The love I had from the peasants in Bel-Air was no longer there, so I became part of a group called the Men in Black. Upon realizing I had aligned myself with a new faction, my old friends in Bel-Air felt betrayed and made me an Enemy Of The State. This set the scene for an epic battle for control of the Wild Wild West.
After the battle were many died, and my legacy grew. I formed an alter ego known as Bagger Vance and became a legend.
However, I decided I was spreading myself to thin, so I decided to take a quiet trip with just me, myself and I Robot to the Islands. However, the male Robots turned out to be lonely and depressed and just a drag to travel with altogether. They told me they had trouble talking with other female robots. I had to act as a liasion and just Hitch common robots together. After that I felt good, and they felt good because it was the first real step in our Pursuit of Happyness.
It's hard to put it all in perspective, and I hate sounding cocky, but with all my accomplishments, yeah I Am Legend.

A letter to my old "partner"

Dear TBS Superstation,

Hey TBS, how are you? I know these catch up letters are always kind of awkward. It feels like it's been such a long time since we last talked. So much has been going on with you, and whenever I call you're never home.
As for me, I'm doing ok. I'm still out in Los Angeles trying to "find myself". Hahaha, I guess same as last time. But if I'm being honest TBS, I think that's in large part to you leaving me. I've changed in a lot of ways, you know, done some growing up.
I don't want to start this letter off by "guilt tripping" you, but since you left me and starting seeing Peachtree, well it's been kinda gray.
I know I shouldn't live in the past and I should get on with my life, but some days are harder than others.
My grandma asked about you recently, you know asked how you were doing. We had a chuckle about you. She always loved watching the same movies Fri night, Sat night, and Sun. Sure she was old and forgot that she had watched the same movie three times in one weekend, but you know how old people forget all the time.
I must inform you with a heavy heart that she passed away two nights ago peacfully in her sleep. The doctors say it was because she had advanced clubfoot. I say it was from a broken heart after being able to watch 'Blue Streak' only once, not twice, or even thrice. The funeral is tomorrow.
I always loved how we made Saturday afternoon our special time. Even if I got really fucked up Friday night, no matter how bad I was Saturday afternoon, I knew I could lay my head down and enjoy The Breakfast Club or any one of John Hughes delightful 80s films, and it just felt 'right.' I really miss that comfort.
I don't know how to describe to you TBS how you made me feel...you always so unique. Starting five minutes after everyone did so while others had their commercials people tuned into and watched you. Sure I was a bit jealous, but it's what made you so special to me and the people who knew you best.
I know it's the holiday season so I guess I am a bit more sentimental this time of year. But Christmas day was always so special. I could always count on you playing The Christmas Story for 24 hours straight, but now that you're with Peachtree now, I don't even know if thats going to happen.
Anyways, I hope to hear back from you and maybe we can catch up if you're ever in town, but please call first.

Have a great holidays TBS, I still think about you.

PS-If you talk to your brother Turner Classics, could you ask him to play a Rambo Marathon?

Eternally yours,

Trace Milyn

Somebody needs to conquer Madden Nation (I nominate Hitler)

I don't know how long the show "Madden Nation" has been on, but it needs to never be off tv forever.
I hate reality tv for a bajillion reasons, make this a bajillion and one. It's one thing to watch contests of physical strength, or using your smarts in a contest.

It's another to watch a bunch of douchebags play each other in video game football.
The idea of watching people has already been done before and it was a work of called "The Wizard."

I can't believe people get paid to "create" ideas for shows such as this. This is the laziest fucking idea ever. Just have dudes play each other in video game football and film their reaction.

Until I see Lucas with a powerglove, or Fred Savage shouting words of encouragement like "Use the warp whistle!", I hope Madden Nation joins the ever expanding list of failed reality tv shows.

I can't give it justice!

Japanese film is very interesting and innovative in a lot of ways. I am very partial of course, but I rented a movie called The Suicide Club last night.

It was what I would deem a satire, but its certainly open to interpretation. It has elements of comedy, thriller, horror, drama, mystery and pathos. The film was praised by critics and was awarded the most groundbreaking film at the Fant-Asia film festival in 2002.

I think some understanding of Japanese culture and how suicide is viewed in Japan would certainly give the viewer a deeper appreciation of the movie. However, that being said it certainly could stand up against other foreign films and hold it's own despite the lack of cultural knowledge the viewer might have.

Check out this link here to get an outline of the story. Totally worth checking out if you are a foreign film fan, and specifically a Japanese film fan.

It's better when they don't sing...(Did you hear that Celine Dion?)

Man if I was a sitcom star I already know what the shittiest day of work would be. No, not when George Wendt eats all of the maple logs from the catering table, but rather the "musical episode." Man those episodes fucking suck. A lot of shows have jumped the shark on those episodes.
But you still have to take a look back and show some love to the best lip sync performances.

California Dreams-"Mama Said"
Man this show was awesome. Sure it was a blatant rip off of saved by the bell, only they played in band, and there were more ethnic people. I loved Sly because he was a poor man's Zack Morris and Jake because he never changed clothes. It was also great because the only gig they could get was at Sharky's.
But after you watch this performance of Samantha belt out 'Mama Said' you really have to question why they didn't go further as a group.
I love in the video how they don't play on Asian stereotypes by having a dragon run through "Sharky's"...wait nevermind. Oh, and I don't play guitar, but I am pretty sure that Jake is not playing the way he should be. It's a slow song, and Jake is rocking out and it looks like his guitar will ignite with all the friction. Come to think of it, Jake's a dick.

Marty McFly-Johnny B Good
Holy Shit! Maybe the best lip sync performance ever! Complete with guitar solo that would even make Hendrix look lame, McFly rocks the fuck out of a 1955 high school dance and as a result almost gets caught in 1955. I watched the extras of BTTF and Fox says that he actually played guitar in real life and all of the fingering and strings were the same as Johnny B Good. It's just awesome how he totally goes apeshit and jumps off an amp, then kicks another one down, then finishes with a back crawl across stage. Oh, and the whole time the band is playing "Blues Riff B" and watching him for the changes and trying to keep up.
My personal pick for best lip sync ever. Sea or no sea, it's hard not to feel enchanted after this performance.

Zack Attack-Friends Forever
I know I bagged earlier on "musical episodes" but when SBTB did them, they did them right. Take your pick from Hot Sunday, The Zack Attack, the Five Aces, or where Jessie sang at Artie's funeral (Slater's pet chameleon) it was all musical magic.
But you have to go with the Zack Attack and Friends Forever performance.Man this video cracks me up beyond belief. It's a mix of Casey Cassum's nostalgic pause, Kelly owning the stage, Lisa's bass which is the 1/87th the size of a real bass, and Screech trying to play keyboard,lip sync and look like he is having fun. Plus that girl in the front row looks like she is in heaven at the "reunion concert".
Hey notice how in California Dreams and SBTB both of the "ethnic" characters are on drums? I wonder why that is?
Anyways, check this out and enjoy!


Milli Vanilli-any concert they ever did

Well I think the fact that their "cd" skipped at a concert and being busted in front of thousands of their own fans is just awesome.

Pick 'em-McFly and Johnny B Good